Thursday, November 30, 2017

T'is the Season

Does Christmas begin too early? Would our culture benefit if we celebrated Halloween only on the 31st? If we waited for Thanksgiving to pass before playing Christmas music on the radio? What if we were to celebrate all twelve days of the Christmas season?

Absolutely all that stuff would make all things civil and spiritual better.

The whole downfall of our civilization began when children began collecting Halloween candy on days other than Halloween. Think about it. What kind of message is that?

Black Friday? Now we have Small Business Saturday and Cyber Monday. But ending it all with Giving Tuesday, before Advent begins sets the season right.

This coming Sunday is the First Sunday of Advent, but before the Holiness begins, the Santa Rampage will rage upon us all this Saturday.

Yes Virginia, there is a Santa Claus,… but not just one. Did you really think one Santa could delivery billions of gifts in a single night? …silly girl.

The Wisconsin Bike Fed is holding a special event for some special Santa’s. The ride begins at 9:30am at a retail establishment fittingly named “Cranky Al’s”. (They have donuts) Santa’s will be rambling in from multiple locations and then streaming off from the “Lakefront Brewery”, where the ride ends.

These are not your mall Santa’s, taking requests and preparing gifts for good little girls and boys. These are the coal bearing Santa’s, the ones you do not want coming to your Chimney.

Yes, Bobby, Cindy and little Billy, not everyone receives a gift for Christmas. In fact out of over seven billion people in the world only 3.141592653 billion actually receive gifts for Christmas (and lots of pie). All others receive the black stuff and I’m not talking goods accumulated on Black Friday.

So take care little Billy, you and your tiny little friends. If Santa should ride by on a bicycle and offer you a gift, turn and run. Run Billy run. You are far to young to be drinking beer.

Merry Christmas to all, and I mean you! Each of you!

The $161 question: What were my three most favorite WORS races? Keeping the same question. Check out the Charity Jackpot Page link in the sidebar to possibly triple the amount.